Everyone is posting these "I'm grateful for" posts and they are so nice and sweet... but I want to see someone bust out with something like, "I'm grateful for bondage tape, edible underwear, and riding crops, without which, my relationship would be far less interesting. Thank you Adult Entertainment Industry." I haven't seen one like that yet and doubt that I will. So, I decided to write one of my own. There are thirteen of them.
2. I'm thankful for the dumb people that I encounter every so often who give me hope that maybe my stress and headaches are a byproduct of having a functioning brain in my head.
3. I’m grateful for bacon and coffee. I’m grateful for having coffee and bacon at the same time.
4. I am grateful for all the things in my closet with a “Must be 18 years of age or older to purchase” label.